Is There Pain After Death?
A grandfather-father-husband-salesman-cook-gardener-hiker-gentleman, adored by many, is struck down by cancer. His disease is particularly horrible, spreading quickly though his body causing damage not only to bone and organ, but to sinew and nerve. He suffers terrible pain for weeks, relieved poorly with inadequate doses of inferior medications, thrashing in misery witnessed by his kin, always at the bedside, ages seven to seventy. Finally, uncomfortable and agitated until the end, he dies. Does his pain continue after death?
Pain that is not relieved in a person’s life continues after they are gone, held as a sordid memory by loved ones. Just as we retain treasured thoughts of joy, wisdom and warmth, we preserve images of pain. Unrequited suffering contaminates memory, preventing healing, healthy grieving and closure. This pain in turn flows across our communities, touching many who may never have met the patient.
This does not have to be somatic discomfort to be treated with pain medication. Shortness of breath, seizures, nausea, wounds and bleeding cast intense images that last more than one lifetime. Uncontrolled anxiety or fear may contaminate a family and corrupt its fiber, as can loss of spiritual path, loneliness, or guilt. Failure to settle past wrongs or mixed intentions results in a loss of opportunity, a psychic wound that will never heal.
A poorly managed end-of-life experience can transform families for generations. I recently heard of a young man who suffered a miserable protracted death from cancer. This resulted in his wife becoming chronically depressed and isolated from her family. She committed suicide, leaving their son a life as an alcoholic and drug addict. The ripples from that one cancer spread out and, through the network of that family, caused pain for many more.
When we think of end-of-life planning, we focus on those immediate moments for the patient and family, as well we should. The opportunity to live one’s life well, even at its end, should not be denied, and must be the first goal of palliative medicine and hospice. However, we cannot overstate the need and potential to protect and even nourish future generations by treating pain of all types in patients with terminal illness, and in families sharing that passage.
There is pain after death, and I suspect it is the cause of much waste, anger and tragedy in our society. We must strive to prevent that suffering. Good things are possible, loved ones can be together, memories shared, and solid foundations laid. Patients, families, doctors and caregivers must protect and treasure even this difficult time of a person’s life, because as one life ends, others are beginning.
As published in Sunrise Rounds.
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Kristen
9:12 pm on Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Coming from a women who lost her then 7 year old son and husband 16 month apart both to cancer. My answer is yes, there is pain after death !
faith
8:44 am on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
kristen, my heart goes out to u. god bless u.
MILITANT ANTI-THEIST
10:57 am on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
god bless u?
if this is the best that "god" could do for these people, why call the evil s.o.b. god?
this is yet another example that if there is a god, what good is he or she?
Monk
12:39 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Dear Militant Anti-Theist, I'll respond to you in good faith, hoping that you are open to understanding, although your calling God an SOB doesn't give me great confidence in your open-mindedness.
The problem of good and evil has been wrestled with in every age. The fact that for believers, God is all-good, all-loving, all-knowing and all-powerful does not mean that evil has no place in the world. The key is that in God's tremendous love, we are granted the free will to choose good or evil. God couldn't be said to love us if we were only able to worship God. God is not the author of evil. Evil is the consequence of a disordered world (where evil is chosen). Also, obviously, much good can come from evil. Otherwise, evil would spread unchecked, and this show would have ended a long time ago. Finally, to ask "What good is God?" implies that God should somehow serve humanity, which is a complete inversion of what believers hold to be the truth of the human-divine relationship. For believers, the question is "What good are we?" The answer is "We are as good as our good desires and actions."
MILITANT ANTI-THEIST
2:24 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
MONK, you have provided yet another mouthful of nonsense in an attempt to validate the human written bible. All reglion is the work of humans, that can't be argued. It's 2012, you must be aware that people lie for self gain... how hard is to comprehend that these were the first of the craft?
an open mind is why i'm an atheist, i had to open my mind that these were all fairytales on my own. Examples would be insemination by a ghost, a flying jesus and a talking snake. I had to think that what i was being told didn't add up. if i was close minded i would likely go along with the 96% of the US population that believes...
Billy Pilgrim
4:27 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Hi Militant anthi-theist,
Nice to meet you. I see that you've felt the need to comment on this person's honest heartfelt words of compassion. I also see that you've decided to inject your own belief into the mix. Good for you. Just because you happen to not need any form of faith or comfort doesn't mean that others don't. Words of well wishes to others in times of hurt are a sign of humanity. Whether borne from a divine being or something as yet understood it ties us all together.
I'm glad you have accepted your beliefs as your own. You must be a strong and knowledgeable person to have figured out such complicated matters as that of the nature of existence. Question. Does figuring out things like that always turn people in pompous jerks?
James Salwitz
9:23 am on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
The pain of such loss must be terrible and while it may with time become tolerable, never truely goes away. I hope you have been able to hold onto memories of happiness.
jcs
FbS
10:23 am on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
so very sorry to hear, Kristan. :( So sorry
Johnny Smith
12:49 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
god was invented to control the ignorant masses. it is also quite a money maker.
Uncle Moe
2:44 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
"God" is not real. All religion was contrived to control and make the population fragmented. Divide and Conquer. Keep drinking the Kool Aid and acting ignorant because "your religion" gives you the excuse to.
Mr monde
2:52 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
but jesus buried all the dinosaur bones for his dad didn't he?
James Salwitz
3:27 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Perhaps when dealing with incredible challenges such as disease or great loss the question is not about religion but about spirituality. Many people, including confirmed athesists, feel a close connection to this world and too other people that gives them deep satisfaction and reassurance, and whether they wish to identify themselves as "religious" they may still be spiritual. Which ever words we use to try and communicate that deep message there is still the possibility of giving and receiving hope.
jcs
MILITANT ANTI-THEIST
3:43 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
doc, with all due respect... spirit and the spiritual world are non-existent. we are all just humans and are accountable for our actions. you can't blame or thank spirit for anything that happens. as far as "karma" and "paying it forward", that is all human accountable action, not a spirit of any kind.
you have to agree that medical science will save or lengthen the lives of people with cancer, not praying... correct?
i have come across very educated people such as yourself and always wondered how they can comprehend the most complicated teachings that i couldn't, yet they believed in god. then i realized comprehension and thinking for yourself are two completely different functions of the brain.
if anyone believes god is all powerful, jump off a skyscraper and pray to live....
Monk
3:59 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Those are very gracious words, James. Thank you.
Religion, spirituality, philosophy .... Does it really matter what a person calls their motivation to "Do this" and "Avoid that"? I think what matters is whether or not a person has integrity and promotes a civilization of love rather than a culture of death. The visceral, hate-filled and mocking responses are all out of proportion to a simple "god bless u".
Published just yesterday:
Dr Eben Alexander, a Harvard-educated neurosurgeon, fell into a coma for seven days in 2008 after contracting meningitis.
During his illness Dr Alexander says that the part of his brain which controls human thought and emotion "shut down" and that he then experienced "something so profound that it gave me a scientific reason to believe in consciousness after death."
Monk
5:29 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
It's true. Comprehension and thinking for yourself are separate, Mil. You do not appear to comprehend religion in the slightest, but that's not stopping you from sharing your thoughts on the subject. And I do not say this in a mocking way. You really have not given any evidence to the contrary.
Olive Soup
3:33 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
This is so silly. Monk is a moron. I don't respect anyone's beliefs when they offer no evidence. I wish I could sell a house that way - "Look I'm not going to show you the house, you'll never get to walk through it, just trust me it exists. Now give me $300,000." The whole notion is ludicrous.
James Salwitz
4:01 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
It may be an issue of definition. I see "spirituality" as a sense of connection to the world and each other, and not the same as spirit (as in ghost or soul) or organized religion, but more to do with how individuals support each other and overcome adversity.
jcs
Monk
5:02 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Either way, you're a decent and caring person, James, if these few posts are any indication.
Uncle Moe
7:48 pm on Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Going by that logic, I should be able to believe in the Easter Bunny and get comfort from him when I'm sick and dying. A lie is a lie, even if everyone believes it.
Capt Jacobsen Mey
9:55 am on Thursday, October 11, 2012
Cut the arguing out, theres enough BS going on in this world, no need to get irrational and blasting others on a blog/public forum too....
Just out in the news - experienced and written by a Neurosurgeon Doctor:
http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek/2012/10/07/proof-of-heaven-a-doctor-s-experience-with-the-afterlife.html
Read it carefully, all (4) pages.
Then, take what you read and decipher it however you want; from a science perspective, a doctors perspective, a religious perspective or from a skeptical perspective... The facts as he outlines in his story can't be refuted when you break everything down, more so when medical equipment documented his body/brain functions (fact) and he was pretty much "brain dead" with almost no chance of coming back.
No one forces anyone to believe in a certain book, teachings and/or to take a certain path - as being human allows each one of us to have an open mind and we chose our paths. Believers of this or that religion, read that above story with AN OPEN MIND.
As for pain after death - the only pain after death is felt by those loved ones who lost someone due to premature death (sickness, accident, murder etc) and/or death due to aging (natural causes etc). The one who passes no longer is in pain as they are set free from their body and mind (which is merely a capsule for the soul). The soul moves onward, it's set free from the body and pain is no more.
Interpret as you will....
stuffin
10:40 am on Thursday, October 11, 2012
I see he saw the Christian God. I sure if he was a Viking he would have seen Zeus.
The people who lose loved ones prematurely or tragically need to reconcile with the event and reach closure (hopefully rapidly as possible) and move on with their lives. This is not easy for many people, may take a long time, but they need to process through the steps of grief, anger, denial, acceptance and the others. I may sound cold, but dwelling on a tragic event will not make it better or make it go away. The only way is to understand what happen, accept it and move your life in the new direction. Stagnation in a bad situation leads to further demoralization.
William H. Bonnie
10:22 am on Thursday, October 11, 2012
Capt. I think you may need to stop hanging out with that other Capt. Capt Morgan. Instead - read this and it will prove that the man in the sky is a farce.
http://blogs.wsj.com/speakeasy/2010/12/19/a-holiday-message-from-ricky-gervais-why-im-an-atheist/
Katy Lake
11:19 am on Thursday, October 11, 2012
I really don't get why some atheists - definitely not all - are so vested in controlling what other people believe. You're an atheist, fine. I won't dissuade you. But why be a horse's ass about proseletyzing your own humanistic religion? 'Militant' atheists of this type (thank God there aren't that many of them) push their irreligious agenda with all the fervor of a Billy Sunday. And just like that, it's obnoxious and irritating.
Freedom of conscience means giving the other guy the same respect you'd want for yourself. Many people deeply believe in their faith. If they aren't trying to fly a 767 into a skyscraper (and we all know the militant types never, ever condemn non-Christian believers), what people believe or why they believe or how they believe is none of your business.
Bringing up this on a blog post about life after death, and about people who just to overcome their grief with the death of their loved ones, is tacky, tasteless, and inhuman.
MILITANT ANTI-THEIST
11:30 am on Thursday, October 11, 2012
KATY LAKE, when you and the government take "in god we trust" off my money, remove "one nation under god" out the pledge then i'll consider not putting in my two cents within my first ammendment right. I am a real atheist, I don't celebrate christmas, easter, halloween, thanksgiving or any other holiday associated with any religion. I can smile everyday without the whiff of an after life or a higher power.
Why do people (other than myself) say god bless you when someones sneezes?
why... because some religious figure decided it was a good idea.
when you sneeze, it should be no different than when you expel any fluid or noise such as a cough, burp, or a fart from your body. the person that did it should say excuse me. This is just another example of an atheist being looked at like a bad person because they don't say god bless you when YOU sneeze.
William H. Bonnie
11:27 am on Thursday, October 11, 2012
Katy Lake's comments are funny. She is ranting against herself in her own post. Thank the easter bunny that there are not many like her and her sister ricki,
Joe
11:28 am on Thursday, October 11, 2012
The thing about atheists that really cracks me up is how they loathe (clearly) having God and religion thrown in their faces yet they have no trouble throwing their disbelief in ours. It makes me a bad Christian (according to the Bible) but I respect your freewill to not believe; it does not bother me in the least and I am not going to spend any time trying to convince you of something of which you will never be convinced. Why is it that you feel compelled to try to convince believers otherwise? How does my belief in God affect you?
Joe
11:29 am on Thursday, October 11, 2012
LOL - seems like Katy and I are sharing a brain today. I really should type faster in the future.
Joe R
11:47 am on Thursday, October 11, 2012
Some of the atheists posting comments here are certainly giving a bad name to atheism. They come across as arrogant, insensitive, pompous and lacking in any trace of sympathy, empathy or human compassion. They sound like Ayn Randians. We still have freedom of religion and freedom from religion if we so choose. If you want to be religious, fine, just don't push your religion in my face and the same goes for an atheist. There should be separation of church and state, the rights of atheists should be respected, there should not be any overt praying in public schools but you can always say silent prayers to yourself, anywhere at any time. As for creationism and Intelligent Design, they have no place in science classes in public schools or any reputable accredited institution of learning. They might be taught as an example of superstition or as an example of a cultural phenomenon gone wild.